Time to Downsize?

As retirement looms, take stock of your 'overhead'

The room that never grew up—When Valerie McKay’s daughter moved out and started her own family, she left a lot of “stuff” at her childhood home. McKay has begun to sort it out so she can make use of the space.

By the time the children are grown and your career is winding down, chances are you’ve accumulated a lot of stuff. The overloaded bookshelves, camping equipment, extra china…is it time to lighten the load?

Whether you’re age 50 and dreaming of a new lifestyle or age 80 and moving into a senior apartment, downsizing isn’t easy. “It forces you to examine your values,” says therapist Tom Miller of Lehigh Valley Hospital and Health Network.

Begin by asking: What’s the next phase of my life going to look like? “Picture what you’ll be doing and you can figure out what you’ll need,” Miller says.

Most of us can pare down to some degree at this stage—it’s more economical, physically safer (there’s less to trip on), mentally freeing, and your family won’t have to deal with it after you’re gone. But one downsize does not fit all. A small condo might be perfect for an avid traveler, but not for someone who wants to spend her retirement gardening, or an involved grandparent who needs a spare room for the playpen.

“I like to call this process re-sizing,” says Valerie McKay of the Center for Humanistic Change in Bethlehem. “You’re deciding what’s meaningful to you now, physically, emotion-ally, socially, intellectually and spiritually.” Here’s how:

Look at all the implications. “If you’re contemplating a smaller home,” Miller says, “make sure you’ll still have access to the things you value, like being able to walk into town.”

Explore alternatives. Could you use the library instead of owning all those books, or public transportation instead of a second car? Could you let Grandma’s carpet go and just keep a photo of it? (You’ll have the memory, but not the upkeep!)

Take it a little at a time. “Start with something easy—say, clothes you never wear—and the river will start flowing,” Miller says. Then set manageable goals: three hours at a time, or a specific part of the house.

Involve your children. “They can help you declutter if you show them how,” Miller says. “For your birthday, ask for a restaurant gift certificate instead of a tie. Talk with them about which of your possessions they’d love to have someday; it’s not a subject they’re likely to bring up.”

Prepare for spousal conflicts. “My husband is much more of a collector than I am,” McKay says. “We’ve learned to respect each other’s turf. He doesn’t bring things into my special relaxation room, and I don’t try to clean his space where he has collector items important to him.”

Don’t be too hard on yourself. If it’s too tough to say goodbye to those old professional files or the favorite gown that no longer fits, put it off for a while. (That’s what mini-storage is all about.)

Get help. There’s a burgeoning industry of professional organizers, but someone you already know might fill the bill. “A good, nonjudgmental friend can help you be objective,” McKay says.

Take satisfaction in knowing that the things you no longer need could be very valuable to someone else. If you donate them, you even get a tax write-off.

Want to Know More? For a list of books and resources to help you make downsizing decisions, call 610-402-CARE or click here.

Published from Healthy You Magazine May-June 2007

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